....when you can dance

"What can you do with a heavy soul?"


1 Cor. 1:18

"For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved....it is the power of God".


My God, how many times have I heard that verse? Why does it take such a small mind 25 years to process and fully understand the meaning of a simple phrase?

I dug into an old cd collection tonight by mistake. I meant to look for a dvd for the wife and I to watch. Instead, I was confronted by an intimate stranger. A stranger whom I had once known in such a close, impressionistic way until I started living life.

This is life that Solomon (arguably the wisest man who ever lived) called "meaningless".

I look around me and feel ok most of the time...so why is this striking me like this?

I can say only this...........I'm thankful. I haven't been coming to God, so He has come to me. Why he even bothers, I'll never know....but I'm thankful.

Here I am tonight....sitting here at my computer....typing these words of freedom when inside I'm so heavy....heavy, but determined for change. I'm asking, "If not now, then when"?

...To Exude Excellence

Excellence. Only recently has this word even attempted to be applied with strength and precision in my life. Actually, up until about 6 months ago, I didn’t even know what that word could ever mean. I mean, what does a boy from Mississippi who moves to Nashville to be around music EVER need excellence for? Better yet, why hadn’t I ever tried to pursue it? I’ve been thinking about these things and I can only really come up with one real solution….this crap is hard work!

It’s a typical scenario. You have someone who has a little bit of talent given to him (or her for the ladies) with a lot of drive and heart and he could really go far. It happens all the time. How often do you hear someone on the radio, on a tv show or even at a live venue and think to yourself “Wow, I could do what THAT person is doing”.

Take a different perspective…and this is the kicker that happens ALL of the time. You have someone who is stupid talented. I’m talking about the guys that can play, sing, write, compose circles around those jerks on reality tv making loads of money off of a karaoke contest. Yes, THOSE people. More times than none, “those people” have no drive, no communication and most certainly no excellence in their work.

Currently I am a worship leader. I am a full time musician. It’s more of a controlled setting and that’s something that I’ve never been used to. In my former circles, I used to be what I like to refer to as the “wing man”. No, I’m not talking about the guy that goes with you on a blind date “just in case” you have to make a getaway. I’m talking about me here….the guy that let the breeze take him wherever. I had no idea what excellence could be and how it could affect every waking aspect of your performance.

Yeah I know….quite an epiphany, huh?

Here’s what REALLY boggles my mind, though. How can I, a Christ follower be anything less than excellent? Am I doing myself and other people a disservice if I come unprepared for a weekend?

Yes. Yes, I am. And on top of that, I would be held accountable. Much like a boss at a job, I would be held accountable if I showed up on a Saturday night or Sunday morning and had nothing ready whatsoever.

So then, whether you are a Christ follower or not, the sheer fact remains that the idea to “exude excellence” is foreign in our society. Whether you’re working for the city making minimum wage (like I did), or in retail (also like I did), or 7 figures (like our reality show karaoke friends…..oh, NOT EVER me) exuding excellence is more than just a Biblical principle…it’s a way of life.

Grace

i have been doing some thinking lately. a lot of thinking really. i normally embrace change...in every way, but there have been times recently where change has affected my mode of thought.

i found myself asking this question: "why grace"? why is there so much grace in my life. there's nothing i have that i deserve. none of my happiness has been warranted and i am in a season of good, strong change that i hold and i feel like i'm waiting for it to implode with no notice.

i don't think that i lack faith, but that kind of thing happens all the time. hills and valleys, mountains and molehills, laurel and hardy. you get the point. there are so many ups that when the down comes...it's devastating.

so here i am at the top of this mountain and the only freakin thing that i can think about is who's at the bottom. i can't get past the fact that there are people that LIVE there. some of them are my friends...so called or not....and some are total strangers. regardless, wherever they are, WHOever they are makes no difference.

some are lost in life and don't have any direction, some are running from a real, true calling, some are in transition and then there are some who just don't care. some don't think they're really there at all, and then there are those that flaunt the fact that they are there. whatever the circumstance...there they are.

"God can release them" is the typical church cliche' that most people say whenever they want to feel sorry without an ounce of remorse for a lack of action. sure God can, but what if He doesn't? what if He's waiting it out? what if He's waiting on the person to quit being to stinking selfish and wake up to the fact that there is a whole silent world that depends on them.

"curse God and die" is what other people told Job when he was dealing with the feces party that became his life. rather than do that, he stayed true. when others would have committed spiritual suicide and died lonely and disheveled in a pile of their dreams of what once could have been, he didn't and was rewarded for it.

so the REAL question is this: should i feel guilty for being on my mountain?

the REAL answer is this: absolutely NOT, because i'm no stranger to the valley...in fact i'll be back there for a visit sooner than i really want. and i can deal with that because i've been learning this truth...

it's all a part of the grand scheme that gradually enriches people *whether they're Christ followers or not*.

the quote "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" has also been bothering me. i've said it before and i've even used it out of context, but i think that there are those other "extreme seasons" that you need for a real purging...or if you're a tree, pruning.

for branches to grow stronger, they have to be pruned...trimmed...cut back...even set back a long way for the sole purpose of making a better tree.
i've heard this analogy a hundred times, but only recently has it made so much sense to me.

now, if you're reading this and thinking "well, that's easy for him to say...he's on a high...a mountain". i promise you this....we WILL be trading places and i'll embrace your position like you will embrace mine. and to that i say...good day.